Tuesday, June 18, 2013

mad dirty crazy sexy love

Writing this blog, and starting with the early relationship between Jack and I ... I find that there are some memories, whole days, full conversations, that burst to the front of my mind, fully remembered, as if they had been waiting just off stage left, waiting for their turn to shine.

But other moments come to me as bright flashes of sensation, a touch, a taste, a whisper in the dark. When I try to remember the minutes before or after, it's a dreamy haze, but that moment, or string of moments stands out so clearly, and they are some of my favorite memories from that long ago summer.


I'm on my back  the twisted sheets of Jack's bed, a light sheen of sweat covering my tanned, naked body. Jack is moving above me, thrusting into me, slowly, slowly, all the way in and then all the way out, my legs are wrapped around his waist, our skin damp where it slides together. My arms are up above my head, my sweaty hands gripping the headboard of his bed, I can feel the roughness of the wood against my fingertips. Jack is relentless, torturing me with the the slow, languid movements of his beautiful cock ... all the way in ... all the way out ... over and over until I want to scream, the friction feels so good. Droplets of sweat fall in slow motion, dripping off of his body and onto mine, and oh how I love that ... every part of us mingled together, our sweat, the sticky slickness between my legs and against his groin, but the sweat, l love the feeling of his sweat dripping on me. I'm moaning and arching my back against the bed, feeling the build-up, all that sweet friction, and if I were to look up over my head I would see my thumbs turn white against the brown wood of the headboard. I want Jack to fuck me like that forever, just the two of us in that small hot room forever wrapped in the smell of sweat and sex and the noises I am making but more than that I want him to touch me ... my little clit is so engorged and aching and I feel like if he would just touch me ... I want to beg him, please! please! please! I want to beg I want to beg and I don't know why so I don't say anything at all I just increase my grip on the headboard until I'm sure it will crack. Jack is looking down at me with that evil smile and his eyes have gone so dark as he stares down at me, helpless beneath him. And I still want to beg but I can't so I just gasp and moan, Jack ... Jack ... oh my god ...  And after, Jack lays his full body on mine, and we slip and slide against each other and try to catch our breath but Jack is making me laugh, telling me he was worried I was going to rip off the headboard and bash him over the head with it, and my smiling, bright-eyed Jack is back and I've forgotten about the begging ... for a little while ...


On the floor at Jack's house, in the dining room. (why were we on the floor, practically under the dining room table?) I'm on my back, and Jack is kneeling between my legs, his hands around my wrists, holding them to the carpet over my head. We're both laughing as I playfully struggle. Jack asks if I want to play "around the world" but I don't know what that is. He smiles mischeviously and promises I'm going to like it. He lets go of my wrists and quickly pulls my Umbros off, sliding them easily down my legs and over my bare feet. Next go the panties, tossed to the side with my shorts. I squeak a little in surprise. His brother Scott is downstairs with his girlfriend. I start to protest, but Jack gives me a look and tells me to be still. So I am still. I start to shiver a little in anticipation as Jack takes off his own shorts and we are both in just our t-shirts, bare from the waist down. Jack slides in between my legs and I instinctually wrap them around his waist, hoping to draw him closer, closer, always closer. He tells me, this is around the world ... he slowly pushes his hard cock into me and I gasp at the sensation, it's still so new to me, that feeling of being filled up ... I raise my hips to meet his strokes as he thrusts into me 3, 4, 5 times, pushing in deeper with every stroke. Now you start to turn, he says, like the world turns, into a new position ... Jack takes my right leg and crosses it over my body, so that I am almost turned on my side. He barely misses a beat as he now pushes into me in this new way, his warm hand on the back of my leg, keeping it in place. I gasp loudly in surprise and pleasure and Jack smiles.  I love that it feels so different, his cock inside me from this angle. 

Suddenly, the phone rings and Jack quickly pulls out of me. Jumping back into his shorts he says, don't move an inch. Points a finger at me and looks stern. Then hurries off to answer the phone. What? Here I am, on my back on the carpet of the dining room in nothing but a t-shirt. Exposed. Vulnerable. The rational thing would be to put my panties on, but Jack said not to move. (Can you hear that? The whispery sound of that seedling of submission, growing and growing and reaching for the sun?) Then I hear it. Footsteps on the stairs.  Scott  to his credit, does not come all the way up. Just enough to look into the living room/dining room area. I tilt my head back and see him, his head is level with the floor. I flush when it registers that I have no idea how much of me he can see. He could possibly see that I'm mostly naked. I am ashamed to realize this gives me a little bit of a thrill. Shea? What are you guys doing? Hmmm ... that is an excellent question. Nothing, just hanging out, I smile from my awkward position on the floor. We're watching a movie, if you guys want to come down. Ok, I say, maybe we will in a minute. He disappears back down the stairs and in a moment, Jack returns. His smile is almost triumphant when he sees that I have not moved, as instructed. 

Back between my legs, he brushes a finger along my pussy, making sure I am still wet for him. I am. And he is still hard for me and I feel the whole length of him thrust into me again. You feel so good, he whispers ... now turn. And I know what is next, though it is another new positon for me. With Jack's hands on my hips I swivel so that I am face down on the floor, and Jack moves with me so that he can stay inside me as I turn. His hands are still on my hips so he pulls me up and back a little and now I'm on my knees, the carpet scratchy against my elbows, and oh oh oh my god I have just discovered my new and forever favorite position and Jack groans behind me because maybe he felt something deep inside me, a clenching of my muscles, a rush of wetness, or maybe he just likes me like this, totally helpless and under his control. I can feel his balls lightly slap against my thrumming clit and the sensation of friction in this position is almost more than I can bear. I start to gasp and moan, but I put my fist against my mouth because I don't want Scott to hear. 

I so so love this amazingly delicious postion, but Jack's hands are insistent and he moves me to my other side, this time with my legs together and curled up to my chest. He manages to stay inside me again as I move, and I presume that he has done this before. I briefly wonder with who, but then thoughts are erased with the feeling of Jack's hand on my thigh, pushing my legs even further up into my chest, and that is doing interesting things to my insides as Jack fucks me. The skin between us, mine and his, has become wet and sticky with the juices of my arousal. I'm sweaty, moaning, getting louder and I don't know what to do with my hands, I need something to clench, to squeeze, so I grab Jack's supporting arm and I look up at him. I can feel the muscles tense under his skin and I squeeze his forearm, hard. Something in my face makes his eyes go all dark and he suddenly pulls out, grabs my legs and spreads them wide. He looks down for a moment, and I flush hot when I see that he is looking at my pussy ... what does he see? Shining moisture caught in the damp curls of my dark pubic hair, pink flesh turning red with use? Whatever he sees makes him growl and he falls upon me, and rams his cock into me so hard I cry out but god, I want it, I want him to devour me, to consume me and he does, sucking my neck, smashing his mouth against mine, biting my lips as he hooks his arms under mine, his hands curled around my shoulders for purchase and slams into me over and over and I can feel how much he wants to own me, can't he see I'm already his? 


We're walking towards the back door when suddenly he pulls me into the tiny downstairs bathroom and locks the door. Without saying a word he pushes me up against the narrow sink console, his hand on the small of my back. I quickly grab the sides of the cold porcelain to stop myself and even as I do, his hands are up the front of my t-shirt, pushing up my bra, running his hands over my breasts, feeling, I'm certain, my nipples harden against his palms. He is pressing into me from behind, and the edge of the sink is pressing into my hips so that I am trapped. Before I can do more than catch a breath his thumbs are hooked into the waistband of both my shorts and my panties, and he pushes them down to my knees. I instinctively push my hips back and out, pressing against him, and I feel the silky slide of his shorts against my ass, the back of my legs, sliding down down down and then it is just us, skin to skin. Where most times he is gentle, now he is not, and I gasp when he pushes into me hard and fast and somehow I know, though this is the first time I've been fucked standing up, to brace my arms and lock my knees and push back against him but not too much so as not to disturb his intense rhythm. Where at first I am surprised and a bit dismayed if I'm to be honest, suddenly a feeling washes over me, and I feel so hot, so loose on the inside, like everything is melting, and I'm so suddenly wet that he starts to glide into me more than push, farther than he ever has. And this position, god I can't get enough of it, him behind me, I can feel him in my lower belly and I start to tingle all over. My legs start to shake and my knees are banging against the wooden cabinet doors with every frenzied thrust, and I'm sure someone must hear it. I tighten my grip on the cool edges of the sink and throw my head back, god I'm so hot and I catch sight of myself in the mirror above the sink. Who is that girl, with the cheeks flushed dark pink, wide dark eyes, lips shining and parted ... tendrils of damp hair stick to my neck and I'm transfixed by the look on my face ... desire, arousal, pure ... ravishment. Seeing this look on my face, was this the beginning of my voyeuristic leanings? Watching myself in the mirror being ravished by this man I love so much? Watching my face in the mirror, panting, moaning, gasping makes me want more more just more and I wish I could see his face, too, I love to look at him as he's fucking me but his mouth is clamped on my shoulder, the soft spot where it joins my neck and all I can see is the curly dark top of his head. 

I feel the jolt of electricity before I register his fingers pressed between my legs, finding my hot spot and I jerk forward and I see it on my face, oh my god, I wish I could describe that look, seeing myself so turned on turns me on even more, I feel like liquid sex, I feel like something is blooming within me and ... I'm becoming ... and suddenly I can't take it anymore, his fingers and cock together finding the molten center of me and I'm rising and the orgasm is building and I can't even look at myself anymore because I have to lower my head and my hands start grasping and clutching at the sink and the faucet and I inadvertently turn on the water. I run my fingers through it and it's so cool I touch my hand to my face and the water drips down my pink cheeks down my neck damp with sweat.  I look in the mirror again and I see the droplets shining on my ecstatic face and I gasp, "oh my god, oh my god" and I wish I could preserve this moment forever because something has changed and Jack has still not said a word but now he looks up from sucking my neck and our eyes meet in the mirror and I know he sees it, he knows, he wraps his arms around me, so strong, and that invisible silver wire that connects us wraps a little more tightly around my soul.


We're downstairs and we've just come back from dinner and I'm leaving soon for college so I'm putting on a brave face and trying to mirror his cheerful disposition but I'm crying on the inside because he still seems perfectly happy to let me go. Really let me go. 
 He sits down on the couch and pulls me towards him so I'm standing between his legs, holding his hands. You look really hot tonight, Shea, he tells me. He looks up at me with a look on his face I can't read. I smile because I planned this outfit for this special night. A short but full skirt that twirls around my long tan thighs as I walk. A cropped tank top that shows my midriff. And a cropped cotton jacket that matches the skirt. Powder blue to show off my tan. Jack leans forward and grabs my ass, pulling me closer towards him. He presses his mouth to my bare stomach and I shiver all over. Just that small amount of contact is enough to set off sparks inside me and that lovely tingling sensation starts between my legs. He continues to kiss my skin, and then puts his hands under my skirt to stroke the backs of my thighs. It's like there is an electrical current that runs from his hands to the muscles under my skin and I jerk forward from the spark in his touch. Jack looks up at me with those dark eyes as he hooks his fingers into my panties and pulls them down. I step out of them and he pulls me onto his lap. I'm straddling him, my arms around his neck, my fingers in his hair and I marvel at the feeling of his erection pressing into my naked pussy through his cotton shorts. It always gives me a thrill when I feel him like that ... I love the rock hard proof of his desire. I wish, I wish, I start to say, but Jack's mouth is on mine, stealing my words. His kiss is soft and gentle, like our first kiss, and I wonder if it will be one of our last. His fingers grip my bare ass and I can feel each finger separately, like he is searing his fingerprints into my skin, marking me, possessing me. We kiss deeply, taking our time, he pulls on my lower lip with his teeth and I touch my tongue to his and we explore, lick suck until our lips are swollen and the whole time I'm rubbing myself against his bulging erection, through his shorts, my hips moving in the tiniest of circles. He slides his hands down my thighs, then pushes me back just a bit so he can reach between my legs to feel how wet I am. I'm still kissing him, tasting, tasting when he slides his fingers into me. Ahhh ... I moan into his mouth, ah ah ah I love that feeling, being taken that way, in hand, in his hands ... I want to melt into him, I want to curl up around his madly beating heart, my back resting against the curve of his ribs. To become a part of the way he breathes, so that he can't live without me. Then this feeling, it rises in me, it's a feeling I haven't experienced before. In my blooming submissive little heart of hearts, I have always reveled in the feeling of being fucked by him. Of being ravished by him. But now, I want to fuck him. I want to make him feel what I do when I am under his power. I unbutton his shorts and pull them down to his knees so that his cock springs free under the circle of my skirt. I press closer to him and grip the back of the couch with my hands to steady myself. I lower myself onto him so that the tip of his cock just barely pushes into me, and I stay like that for a moment, for just a few heartbeats, my body aching to take him all the way in, but instead I raise myself up and off for a few heartbeats more, and back down again, giving him a few millimeters more, but just barely. My flushed cheek is pressed against his and I can feel his breath against my ear and hear how it catches just a bit every time I rise off. It fills me with this incredible sense of power in my femaleness, in my own burgeoning sense of sexual self, in my ... fuck that it makes me feel so good making him feel good that I can barely restrain myself. But I do, oh the restraint I show as I lower myself inch by excruciating inch, and rise up and completely off every time I give him just a little bit, a little bit, a little bit more of the hot slick velvet of my insides. Now we are both breathing heavy, getting sweaty and I'm still teasing teasing teasing my legs trembling against his sides when he can take no more. Fuck! he growls and grabs my hips on my next upswing and pushes me down hard, impaling me on his cock so roughly we both cry out and he's all the way in up to the hilt all at once. And though he lets me stay on top he takes back control, moving me, his hot hands on my hips, my thighs, up under my tank, mauling my breasts, squeezing my ass and I hold on tightly to the back of the couch and move with him, against him, for him and our bodies are slapping together and my thighs are slick with sweat and all I feel is that insane friction and his hands on me the strength in his hands. He pushes his head back into the couch when he cums and I press my forehead against his and ride it out and I see something in his eyes I don't usually see ... we sit like that for a while, my legs still trembling, his cock twitching inside me, my arms around his neck, his hands stroking the bare, sweaty skin of my lower back and our faces are so close together I can't help but see that maybe he isn't letting me go so easily after all.


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